Today I drove a golf ball into my wiener

May 6, 2011: To lower my chances of embarrassment on an upcoming trip to a golf course, my father and I headed to a driving range to hit a bucket of balls. That trip ended up being a great reminder that golfing is a dangerous sport.

My first few practice swings seemed to be quite horrific as the golf ball would come back at me in slow motion after I would somehow hit the golf ball into the divider (that is there to protect others) instead of far out onto the course - causing me to take evasive action ducking and weaving to avoid injury. Other individuals quickly learned to stay away as my golf balls would magically appear in back of me, coming close to them as they took a break on the benches off to the side of the tees.

I was about 99% successful dodging the 1.620 ounce (45.93 gram) golf balls I hit at myself. There was only one ball that I successfully failed to dodge and that one resulted in a solid blow to my wiener as it hit the wall and came right back at me. My dad was standing there watching this happen in real time trying to figure out what I am doing wrong. For me, this shot was in slow motion – unfortunately…not slow enough.

Today, I drove a golf ball into my wiener and I am somehow still alive to tell you about it. Perhaps I am here for a reason…perhaps it is to educate golfers about the hazards of golfing. Next time I make it out to the practice facilities, I might have to consider being the only one out there wearing a helmet, a mouth piece and of course, a safety cup…to protect my wiener.

Note: Photo pulled from golfswinggurureview.com