Move over Euro Disney…make some space for Peru Disney!

August 17th, 2010: I have heard along the “gringo trail” that Peru is a place that is quite efficient on squeezing ever dollar out of the tourists that come through here. I don’t know if I really believed it…until I reached southern Peru. I am thoroughly confused on what is real or not anymore…feeling as if I stepped into Disney’s new theme park…Peru Disney. Let me make this clear…I like Disney – except for that mouse. It just feels like everyone is in costume screening me from seeing what this region is truly about…being overrun by the hordes of tourists and those who are trying to capitalize off the tourists.

I am now back in Cusco after originally arriving and then quickly leaving the next day, making my way to ancient Inca city named Machu Picchu…via train and bus. As planned, I performed no unnecessary hiking.

The equation for Cusco: Cusco = πr^2, cold nights, 1,000’s of women wanting to give you massages without happy endings and many art dealers roaming the streets selling paintings in convenient mobile carriers. There are also plenty of women and mangy men selling snacks, dolls, hats and anything with the words “Machu Picchu” carved, etched, sewed or drawn on it.

Indigenous women and the modern day hippie seem to fill the sides of the streets and plazas as they are all busily making something. The majority of Indigenous women make these brightly colored straps which actually aren’t that bad since they have a multitude of uses, unlike the common hippy accessories such as bracelets that are sold throughout all of northern South America – I am seriously beginning to think they all took the same class: Introduction to Hippie Bracelets 101.

I thought of one good use for the straps that the indigenous women sold. Perhaps it can be used to choke one of the many restaurant employees that escaped the confines of the eating establishment with the sole purpose to hang out in the street with their overpriced tourist menu trying to get you inside. If they are not selling carrot cake or apple pie with ice cream…they have a slim chance getting me in. It would be nice though, if there was a sticker a restaurant could give you after you eat or get coffee, putting it on your shirt so that other restaurant employees can reduce vital loses of calories by saving their breath and help me save some calories by not having to say, “no gracias” (Translation: no thank you) ever 0.0004 seconds. This place reminds me of blog post about Cartagena in the north coast of Colombia, but instead of being attacked at sea level by these people, I am now being attacked at 3300 meters(10800 feet) in Cusco.

All throughout southern Peru I noticed that a lot of parents here seem to have this bright idea to put their children to work…some jobs seem better than others but none have been as bad as the dried poop patty sellers in India or the road workers in Cambodia. Never the less, they are put to work to earn their keep. Some kids’ jobs are being sent out into the streets dressed in traditional bright colored clothing holding baby sheep as they ask you if you want a photo with them.

The going rate for a photo with someone is S/.1 (Conversion: $0.36 USD). Even though this is the going rate…I saw tourists give these three girls tooth brushes for payment instead of cold hard coins. The kids looked all confused like they never seen a toothbrush before as they analyzed it. One of the girls showed her appreciation and took the tooth brush, understanding the concept and brushed something…it just wasn’t her teeth. She brushed the baby goat she was holding before she put her brand new, now dirty toothbrush into her pocket. The toothbrush idea was a great idea, I thought…but I don’t think it went over very well with the kids. It is sort of like getting healthy stuff for Halloween back home when combing the streets, trick-or-treating - you don’t like it, but the parents do.

Some of the children’s jobs are not as easy as walking around with baby sheep. One morning during my stroll in the small town of Pisac, I saw some boys taking these bulls to some unknown location. I observed that when a bull wants to go somewhere, it will go somewhere no matter how big or small you are…especially when you are 50 pounds (no – I didn’t weigh him). This one little boy was struggling with one of the beasts and kept pulling him trying to guide him to go down a different street. The bull stopped after a brief battle…turning toward us. Moments later after the lost battle, I saw the boy run around the corner dropping the rope.

What I was seeing, reminded me of the scene of the crazy men who run with the bulls in Spain down a narrow street - at times when they are too slow, getting a free flight or get raped by a horn. Standing there, I was so busy recording the event that quickly unfolded before me with my camera, taking photos…I paused when the bull changed his stance looking at me. I was now the only person in the street and I was directly in the bull’s path. My brain did not seem to function at that moment as my eye was glued to my camera worrying more about the photo possibilities. Thankfully…I didn’t interest the bull.

I am pretty sure I have seen all the rocks and mud piles I am “suppose” to see around here the past few days. It was like a painful checklist that I am happy to have completed. Actually not all of them were that painful. My camera and I really enjoyed Machu Picchu and some salt and circular dry terraces.

Others were so ridiculous I too enjoyed them because of the good laugh it gave me.

The past two days I have been trying to get a bit organized as I am will be heading off to the Amazon basin for a 9 day trip. Writing for a travel website can be so tuff at times – laughing. The last time I visited the Amazon, I transported a parasite from the jungle to the big city of Quito - free of charge as it caused me great discomfort until I decided to go the doctors. This time…I will swim with my mouth closed so tightly, nothing will be getting in.